Third Bit

Del wasn’t allowed inside the locked ward, so Lucy was forced to leave her alone in a waiting area on the same floor near a nurses’ station.  The unit secretary promised to keep an eye on her, and that would have to do.

Lucy rang the buzzer and, once her identity was satisfactorily established via intercom, an orderly came and unlocked the door eying her suspiciously as she entered.  Inside, her identity was checked again.  The pictures on her driver’s license and teacher’s ID were scrutinized more carefully than they were at airport security checkpoints.  Finally, after enduring a ‘pat down,’ she was handed a printed list of rules and regulations to be scrupulously observed while on “The Ward.”  She was handed a pen and asked to attest her understanding and acceptance.  As she was led by an orderly down a noisy corridor to a private room, Lucy couldn’t shake the feeling that she was visiting San Quentin.  Furious obscenities, unseen inmates snarling and snapping like rabid dogs at unseen orderlies, emanated from many of the rooms.  Lucy wondered if this went on all night.  She didn’t want her father to have to find out.

Her first glimpse of Max Grace was shocking.  His usually genial expression was overwhelmed by the weight of his emotional pain.  It was like a tsunami of grief had ravaged the well-loved hills and valleys of his face.  His calm confidence had been replaced by irritation, frustration and anger.  But then he saw Lucy standing in the doorway.

She managed a smile and said, “Hello, Dad.”

His face caved in on itself, his eyes filled with tears and he tried to sit upright to catch her in his embrace.

“Lucy!  My baby girl!”

He held her tightly, his mouth against her left ear, whispering how sorry he was, that he hadn’t meant to do it, that it was all a mistake.

“Of course it was.  You were just feeling sad and couldn’t sleep.  I understand.”  Lucy pulled back to look at him.  She tried to chuckle; not easy when you’re seeing your father in a psych ward under partial restraint.  “Believe me, Dad.  I know the feeling.  You just took a few too many pills.  It happens.”

He allowed himself to relax against the bed pillows and began to look more himself.  Relief flooded his face.  “Exactly,” he said emphatically.  “That’s exactly what I’ve been trying to tell these morons!  It was a pure accident.  That’s all.  Your sister –“  His face twisted with anger again.  “She won’t even consider signing the Release.  She wants to punish me.  She wants to keep me in here so she doesn’t have to worry about me.”  Max clutched Lucy’s hand.  “But you can sign the Release, Lucy.  You can get me out.  Tell them it was a mistake, a simple mistake.  I mean, my God, those pills were your mother’s.  They were ancient.  That’s why I took so many.  I didn’t think they’d have any oomph left in them after all these years.  I just wanted to sleep.”

Lucy gave her father’s hand a reassuring pat.  “I’ll go talk to the doctor, if I can find him.  Don’t worry; I’ll find someone, and we’ll get the release process started.”  Lucy noted his expression of profound relief and hated to say anything to change it.  But it had to be said.

“Dad, look.  I understand about the pills.  I really do.  I just don’t understand about the gun.  Why was your service revolver in your hand when Delia found you this morning?”

Lucy had never seen her father’s face set with determination the way it did now.  “It wasn’t what it looked like, Lucy.  I can’t explain it to you.  But there is absolutely no reason to believe that I would have shot myself.  No reason at all.”

Lucy recognized the lie, but she also recognized the truth.  He had considered it, perhaps even planned it, but it wouldn’t happen again.  Still, a man depressed over the sudden death of his wife should not be in possession of a firearm and she would confiscate the gun the second she got him home.  At any rate, she was sure that would be a condition for his release.  Lucy gave her father a wink from the doorway, then headed down the corridor  in search of someone who could start processing the forms that would get her father out of Bedlam.